Ubuntu and Authenticity: Being Vulnerable and Leaning on Community for Accountability

Have you ever heard the phrases, “You think you’re all that and a bag of chips” or “You think your sh.. don’t stink.”? These were cultural ways that we have told each other that we need to check ourselves.

Even though we may get mad or get our feelings hurt when we hear these phrases, we need people in our lives that will hold us accountable and help us to remember that we are not self-made as we are sometimes encouraged to believe. If we are doing the right thing, the Divine Creator will lift us up and we can proudly walk in the path of the Spirit. And that is a beautiful feeling.

Fellas, I’m talking to us on this one. Sometimes we like to portray ourselves in the public and online like we have it all together. I have told people in conversations that I definitely do not have it together. I do this because I don’t want people to elevate me. I know my flaws. I hate that I have them but I know that we can’t be 100% perfect (having nothing wrong) according to the Cambridge Dictionary. None of us are flawless.

We may be focused on making sure our families have everything they need for every day functions in this society. But we sometimes forget about their emotional needs of us being present with them in the moment. You may be reading this and you may have it all together. If so, good for you. However, I know that I struggle with this because I have dealt with so many spirits when I am away from home that I am sometimes depleted when I get home. My wife and I have purposefully worked to make sure our house is a place of refuge. So when I get to my safe space, I want to hide away from the rest of the world. From time to time, I have to be reminded that it is not fair to my family to give them the spiritual leftovers of the day. I am guilty. I have this weakness.

I know there are times people get on social media and only talk about the good they are doing so that it appears they have all the answers. I wanted to write this to let my readers know that I am not here to create a façade that portrays me having it all together. I struggle with things because I am human. However, this blog post is to remind me and anyone who is reading it, you do not have all the answers to life. But please make sure you get to know the One who does. I hope this encourages you to understand even though you may have a lot of influence in this world, never forget the ones who paved the way for you. Let’s do our best to give our best to our families. Someone is watching.

You never know how or when you’ll have an impact, or how important your example can be to someone else.

Denzel Washington